It?s that time of year again. Admissions letters are out and prospective students are sizing up the University to consider making Hyde Park their home next year.
We pulled two prospies out of a housing information session to find out why they would want to become part of the netherworld where the squirrels are more aggressive than the boys, the chipmunks prettier than the girls, and the winters colder than sin.
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Jared Conrad-Bradshaw, Massachusetts
Maroon:Why are you considering coming here?
JC: I was probably fed paint chips at some point as a child. That, and it just seems like a very unique place.
M: Unique? As in we?re all ugly?
JC: Well, you people aren?t as ugly as you make yourselves out to be. Seriously, I think you?re not so bad.
M: I?ll assume that by ?you? you mean the student body. But thanks. Where else did you consider going?
JC: Brown. But they were pretty pretentious and full of dicks. But this place is full of dorks. There?s a difference.
M: Brown?s full of dicks?
JC: Yeah.
M: You realize today is the nicest day of the year? Last week it snowed and next week it?s supposed to be like 40 degrees out.
JC: Yeah, but I?m from New England. I?m used to crappy weather.
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Talya Lieberman, New York
Maroon: What have you heard about the University?
TL: My brother went here, and he had a great time. But now he hates the world.
M: That?s pretty intense?does he hate himself also?
TL: No, he?s okay with himself. I don?t really understand it though; everyone here seems pretty nice.
M: You?ve been here a day, give it a little more time. What is your sense of the University atmosphere?
TL: It feels like camp.
M: Core?
TL: I like it?I?m a very indecisive person, and having to take all those classes will help me become well-rounded.
M: Palevsky: Ten words or less:
TL: Ugly as sin.
M: Besides a ?well rounded education,? what are you looking for in the ?college experience??
TL: I want an intellectual experience where I?m stimulated and become a larger person and am able to learn about myself through interesting experiences.
M: I?m not the admissions office. What do you really want from college?
TL: Getting drunk off my ass maybe? Some good parties. Nah, seriously, I want to have a good time, maybe meet a really great guy.
M: If you want a cute guy, you picked the wrong school.
TL: You misheard me?I want a ?great? guy. I know most of the guys here are dorks, but I think I am too at heart. You have to be to want to go here.