Mazur family vacations always inevitably morph into two-week-long discussions/symposiums/colloquiums/celebrations of my most awful and inherent flaws. So, when conversation at a recent dinner in Milan turned to why I would never find a spouse until I became a more patient/polite/forgiving/accepting person, I wasnt fazed.
But while I long ago gave up on gaining my familys approval, at 21, Im not quite ready to admit defeat in marriageor at least some sort of a long-term emotionally and sexually satisfying partnership. Thus, my New Years resolution: to be a nicer person. (You, too, may have concluded that my family is a bunch of jerks who dont deserve to be beneficiaries of my resolution. They are exempt.)
The success of my resolution will signal the end of an eraIll truly miss my smart-ass comments, my overbearing honesty, and my brazen bitchiness, though probably no one else will. Its not the same, but when Im feeling particularly sappy (lost without my trademark rudeness), Ill always have Ed Debevics, where the motto is Eat and Get Out.
This 50s-style diner specializes in a waitstaff who thrives on dishing out short-order fare with caustic comments and copious amounts of sass. Theyll criticize and mock you with reckless abandon, and somehow it ends up coming across as slightly, well, charming. (Ive always liked to think of myself in a similar manner.)
The food at Eds is significantly less distinct than the waitstaff. Its no different than any typical greasy spoon menu. If all youre looking for is a classic hamburger and fries, or a bit of childhood nostalgia in the form of grilled cheese or meatloaf, you wont leave disappointed; you also wont leave thrilled. The sundaes, pies, and classic malt shakes are probably your best bet if youre really looking to be impressed. Theres no kids menu, but the list is pretty kid-friendly to begin with, offering such childhood favorites as hot dogs and chicken fingers.
What makes this place memorable has very little to do with the food. Rather, its the dead-on campy décor and general tone of the whole place. Neon lights, an antique soda fountain, oversized gumball machines, and classic oldies (danced to by waiters dressed like Elvis and Marilyn) come together to generate a sort of pervasive cheer that manages to shine through the decidedly sour attitude of the staff. Try to avoid the place on weekends and other high-traffic times, as the place is first-come, first-serve, and there are often large school groups crowding the parking lot and waiting for tables.
This is the place to bring your parents and younger siblings when they come to visitbecause while you might not be able to lash out at your nagging mother as much as youd like, its almost as fun watching your waiter do it.