Financial aid: priceless

By James Conway / May 20, 2008

President Zimmer has recently made several big announcements regarding expensive initiatives and projects that the University hopes will be beneficial in the near and long-term future. These frequent announcements of incredibly expensive projects are starting to sound like a MasterCard commercial—one can almost hear the smug narrator list off the series of expensive items: “New...

Jackie and Jet join forces against evil—at last

By James Conway / April 18, 2008

[img id=”80489″ align=”alignleft”] The plot of Forbidden Kingdom is not that important. More significant is that the film features Jackie Chan and Jet Li, two of the greatest kung fu artists since Sonny Chiba and Bruce Lee, sharing the same screen for the first time—for American audiences, anyway. The film in a nutshell is about...

Primary frontloading pays off

By James Conway / January 25, 2008

Racing toward February 5, it has become increasingly clear that for the first time since 1988 we have a primary election where neither nomination has been decided before the “Super Tuesday” states have voted. At this point, it’s even money on who will take the Democratic Party’s nomination. On the other side, the Republican race...

Magic gone in Sox win? Fans don’t think so

By James Conway / November 1, 2007

The Red Sox have won their second World Series in four years, and I feel as elated as any fan would. There was jumping, screaming, and running around the halls. I called my family and friends back home and played “We are the Champions” and “Dirty Water” on my laptop. Yet something was missing: that...

Blackwater, military don’t mix

By James Conway / October 12, 2007

When someone responds to civilian deaths he indirectly caused, he really shouldn’t say “People make mistakes; they do stupid things sometimes.” Unfortunately for his company and more unfortunately for the American people, that is exactly what Blackwater CEO Erik Prince did last week during his sworn testimony before Congress concerning the reckless actions of his...

How the GOP can win in ’08: impeach Bush

By James Conway / May 25, 2007

The Republicans are desperately seeking a new strategy for victory in 2008 and, as their self-appointed strategist, this political junkie and armchair campaign manager has a novel idea that will in fact allow the GOP to retain the White House. Considering the various factors currently keeping the Republicans’ morale and hopes for victory down, it...

The key to ending genocide in Darfur: China

By James Conway / May 4, 2007

While organizations like our campus’s own Students Taking Action Now: Darfur (STAND) will continue to push for American institutional divestment and to argue and infight over how to spend President Zimmer’s “blood money,” the true key to solving the Darfur crisis remains ignored. This key that will unlock the padlock on international action regarding the...

Hate France? Royal’s your (wo)man.

By James Conway / April 27, 2007

Recent polling has shown that French voters remain undecided heading into next week’s presidential election. Never fear, good people of France—I am here to help make your decision easier. For you see, unlike most ignorant Americans, I understand you very well. I understand that you enjoy a foreign policy that appeases your enemies and snuffs...

Imus controversy fails to delve below the surface of racial

By James Conway / April 17, 2007

It seems that the recent trend of white celebrities saying racist things and ruining their careers has continued unabated. The most recent example is Don Imus, a so-called “shock jock” on CBS and MSNBC, who recently referred to an all-girls college basketball team as “nappy-headed hos.” In doing so, he subjected himself to a series...

Director Bong Joon-ho and his monster invade Chicago

By James Conway / March 6, 2007

I entered a room that was crawling with members of the press—well, just three members, myself included. As we sat and waited, the other two tried quizzing me on my knowledge of monster films, and we all agreed that Bong Joon-ho’s newest monster film The Host was a very unique one. For those of you...

Wild Hogs sends audiences to the slaughterhouse

By James Conway / March 6, 2007

As the lights came on in the theater, I sat speechless and alone. No, I had not just seen the maniacally inspired performance of Forrest Whittaker in The Last King of Scotland, or even the redundant performance of Denzel Washington in the appropriately redundant film Déjà Vu. I hadn’t even see Martin Lawrence try to...

Women deserve better than Hillary

By James Conway / March 6, 2007

The other day, I was having a polite discussion with a few political junkies about Barack Obama’s candidacy. One of them, who happened to be a female, interjected that although she disagreed with Hillary Clinton on most policy issues, she thought it was more important to have a female president. The thought that someone would...

Remembering the absurdity of another Super Bowl

By James Conway / February 6, 2007

Storm clouds gathered above the arena pouring rain upon its muddied surface. Suddenly there was a spontaneous crackling of lightning and a sudden explosion of pyrotechnic light. As the smoke dissipated, an ancient symbol emerged out of the ground along with a strange man playing a guitar. This was no mere man, this man was...

Catastrophes of the past come back to haunt film with a bad case of Déjà Vu

By James Conway / November 28, 2006

What if you could go back in time and prevent a terrible catastrophe before it started? This age-old question is tackled in a very unchallenging and conventional movie by the Jerry Bruckheimer team that brought audiences other reality-bending existentialist fare including Pearl Harbor and The Rock. Bruckheimer and director Tony Scott tackle a question that...

Want to die in style? Go fight a bear?

By James Conway / October 27, 2006

Recently I had the privilege of turning 18 and officially becoming an adult. My life will soon be filled with the joys of a nagging wife, annoying children, and a dead-end job working for a moron boss. I will pay bills and taxes, and then I will retire on what little savings I have left...