Some notes on what is like here at the U of C.
Girl claims she saw cute guy on campus
Last Friday, second-year Annie Spence claims she saw a cute guy having dinner at the Pierce dining hall.
“He was the most gorgeous guy I’ve ever seen,” she said. “He was well-built, had a dazzling smile, and the most amazing profile.”
Spence’s friends doubt that she is lying, but they suspect that she might have been having a hallucination. Her roommate, Tracy Dobbs, said “Spence had a really wild spring break. I think she might still be suffering from the side effects.”
Another friend, Ryan Peterson, attributes Spence’s sighting to an overworked brain. “Annie has a core bio presentation on Monday, and two papers due on Tuesday. She’s been really stressed and maybe that led her to imagine things.”
Although University officials believe that the sighting was probably not a security breach in the dining hall, they are still not taking any chances. University Police have been alerted to watch for the intruder, and anyone who sees a cute guy on campus is advised to contact them.
Prospie excited about the U of C
Sandra Knight, a prospective student from Greenville High School in Ohio, expressed enthusiasm at the thought of enrolling in the U of C this fall. Knight feels that the U of C is a place where she will get an “awesome education”.
“When I heard that you guys have a 24-hour study space, I knew that this place takes academics seriously,” she said.
During her two-day stay, Knight was able to sample the sumptuous fare at the University’s three dining halls, and she already has an opinion about them all. She commented that, “Bartlett rocks because it’s always crowded, and so by the time you get to your seat your food is cold and ready to be eaten. It’s also really exhilarating when you have to fight for cutlery. Pierce is also good because if you’re starving and you happen to be near it, you don’t have to walk down the street all the way to Bartlett in order to satisfy your hunger. I like BJ the least because it smells weird.”
Knight is also excited about the choice of dorms. She has narrowed her list of favorites down to two dorms, Pierce Hall and Shoreland Hall. “I love how Pierce rooms are so efficient. You open the door and jump straight into bed. The compact size of the room really saves you from having to clean often.”
As for Shoreland, Knight cites its distance from the main campus as a plus. “Some Shoreland residents told me about how in winter, the snow is sometimes so heavy that buses stop running, and so students walk to school,” Knight said. “The idea of having to trudge through five feet of snow really appeals to the adventurer in me.”
When asked why she did not consider Max Palevsky, a popular choice with students due to its location near the main quad and its new facilities, Knight said: “Oh, the rooms are really nice and all, but bright orange is just, like, so not me.”
Senior who stepped on RC seal set to graduate
Well into his last quarter at the College, fourth-year Douglas Brown is optimistic about his chances of graduating, despite having stepped on the school seal in the Reynolds Club not just once, but five times.
“Everyone knows that a student who steps on the seal has no chance of graduating from the college in four years,” said Brown. “But I really think I might prove that superstition wrong.”
An economics concentrator, Brown says that he is optimistic about not screwing up his final quarter. “Stats and econ should be fine. I’m a little worried about my class on Asian civilizations, but other than that I’ll definitely be getting my B.A. done this year. Take that, Reynolds Club seal!”
